August 14, 2020

Acceptance

Ireland 2018. This is one of my favorite moments of that trip. The beauty of the morning light at Glendoulough. Sometimes to accept what is you have to look at things a bit differently.

2020 definitely has proven to me that you have to look at things from different angles, before you can accept them. The first couple of months of 2020 started out a bit rocky. We learned to navigate how to manage chemo and other treatment options all the while juggling the schedules of two busy kids. I had thought things were starting to turn a corner, I had a new job as a Starbucks Barista, the kids activities had a rhythm/flow to them. Most importantly, things seemed like V was going to get the green light for the liver resection.

ENTER COVID. THE WORLD STOPPED. WE STOPPED.

What Covid has changed, was is hard to comprehend. It, sometimes always feels like I am living in a dream. Nothing is the same. It’s easy to forget what day is which, and get bogged down in the fact that our image of what is doesn’t match our mental idea, of what we want.

When that happens I TRY to focus on the flip side. The side that doesn’t quite mirror what I thought things should be like. Truth – this image of the trees, didn’t come out quite how my mind saw it. Instead of focusing on what didn’t go right, with the photograph. Each time I see this image, it I focus on the moment I took it. The feeling of the crisp morning autumn air, the smell of the earth and the amazing sense of peace that you feel when hiking at Glendalough.

A great reminder that I have to remember to breathe and Accept what is right in front of me, not ahead or behind.

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